So Bralover, I guess I'm saying enjoy what she likes to do with you but be prepared for it to end sooner rather than later. It just doesn't sound tenable with her being married. Of course, that's just the opinion of a stranger on a forum, even if it is one trying to be helpful and really understanding what you're going through.
Here is my take on it!
She started off as your masseuse and giving you waxings; teasing your feminine side. But more as a business angle and not a friend. Then she sold you some of the bags she wanted rid of. And probably sees it as a game, playing with you a bit. Might even be a thrill...
The taking you shopping is a game to her too.
The danger comes from letting down all your guards. And I once liked a girl who played me against a friend. I let down all my guards and at the time I thought she was wonderful. Falling for someone who then is with someone else is very painful. You cannot explore your girl and forget she's there. The more you play the more you can miss - unless the experience is so embarrassing, so traumatic, you never want to again. Or trauma could help you like humiliation to deal with it!
I never planned to fall but I did and been single ever since.
I know I need someone that gets me/andrea and its pointless pretending I don't because she won't go away now. I unlocked her!
I'm healed now, but it took a long time and I'm still wary of falling for someone that could push my buttons in ways I don't want. But I do want to be understood also.
So as long as you are friends playing dressup - it's okay. But as others have said, you need to be open to someone that is single and can love you for who you are.
All jokes aside; ie Petey Pudding, you deserve someone nice.
In my experience, exploring a few things has allowed me to file them, but does not mean they are gone gone, just more appeased. But exploring myself has not meant I am controlled. I think I would like a bit of sub but just because I like fem things, I don't see why I cannot like some dom in my male side too. Trouble with fem dom is it affects my male side.
I have met a few women I can talk to online, one in US, but no one to play with. But it worries me if I did as I don't want andrea to become stronger...at least take me over. And she wouldn't but I might like more...
When shopping, I find the best approach is to say what I like, want to explore. I don't care if they get it really, just that they give me good customer service... So far, all have been fine.
In a private shop once, she did give me a hard time initially; a tease, but then got into it. Think she liked it a bit! Not been for a while as dear, but liked it! Female joking can affect your male ego and make you someone else.